Realizations
by Dorothy G
Summary: After a change in their dynamics Bonnie sees Damon in a new light. One-Shot


**A/N:** So, I was in a mood and listened to the radio when Taylor Swift's 'You belong with me' came on. Should explain enough about this one-shot...

**Disclaimer:** I don't anything belonging to the Vampire Diaries or anything else your recognize and neither do I own the Taylor Swift song. I'm not making any cash with it.

Enjoy reading!

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Bonnie was sitting in the Mystic Grill doing her homework. Just up until a few months ago she'd never believed that she would do her school chores in a restaurant. A place where she had a lot of fun just hanging out with her friends, eating together without someone's nosy parents wanting to know what their kids were speaking about and playing pool. A place where she could just be.

But now, she needed the Mystic Grill. It became somewhat of a refugee for her. Her home was quiet and lonely, her father still was never around (only at times when she really didn't need him to linger around was he off work) and her grams' house was long sold. Elena had her own problems and with all that was happening the witch didn't want to stay with Elena. Ever since the Salvatores came into all of their lives it was like a wedge had been forced between the once best friends. And with Caroline being a vampire now Bonnie couldn't turn to her – not yet at least.

So, Bonnie found herself once more at the Mystic Grill. Here she had people around her and background noises. It wasn't eerily quiet like it was at her home but at the same time there wasn't anyone who would come to her and disturb her concentration.

That was until a few minutes ago.

A few minutes ago Damon Salvatore had walked into the Grill and went straight up to the bar. Bonnie didn't know what it was but the moment the door had opened for Damon she felt the urge to look up to the entry way. It was like a foreign force was leading her actions. After realizing it had only been Damon the witch concentrated herself on continuing her homework. Somehow, though, she couldn't keep her eyes away from him and chanced a few more glances at him than she was willing to admit.

Lost in her own thoughts Bonnie remembered the night a few days prior. They had been fighting yet another battle against vampires who'd come to town just to wreak havoc. As so often their gang had totally underestimated their numbers and strength. Not only had the original ones been more than they had thought but they had turned quiet a few people into new vampires and had them working for them.

Elena had to do the things she seemed to do best in the last few months. She'd tried to play the hero and followed the others of their little group to join forces. Of course it had turned out like everyone else had predicted: she hadn't lasted one minute before she'd gotten severely wounded and gone down unconscious. Stefan had run to her and without taking a look around had hurried Elena to the hospital. (He really hadn't wanted to risk her taking his blood yet again. Because of recent similar stunts the doppelganger had enough of Stefan's blood remaining in her body.)

Next one to go down had been Alaric. Though he had quite some experience in fighting vampires his reflexes were still a lot slower than those of a creature of the night and those of a witch. Luckily, he had been wearing his magical ring and would return to the living. With one glance around the battlefield Bonnie had realized that they'd been losing ground very fast. Damon had been battling three vampires at once and Caroline had been attacked by two vampires both a lot bigger and more important older than her. How she had survived that long was a miracle. The teenage witch had known it was up to her to get them out alive.

Ignoring that she, too, had been at the end of her strengths she had changed her current spell and had used another more powerful one. Suddenly, it had been like in those comics. A force field had thrown everyone around them to the ground and had them put out cold. Damon, her and Caroline had been the only ones left, though Damon had been they only one truly conscious. After the powerful spell the little witch had been lying on the ground barley responsive. The blond vampire hadn't done any better. She'd been severely wounded and had needed blood immediately.

Looking at his child – it still was strange to call Caroline that – Damon had seen that she hadn't been in any condition to take care of the witch. With a nod Damon had given Caroline the okay to go hunting – he would take care of the witch.

Walking closer to Bonnie to check on her the vampire had seen Alaric coming back again. Soon he'd be recovered. Therefore, the remaining vampire had been able to direct his attention completely on the witch.

Kneeling down next to her still body Damon had checked if she'd still been breathing. Even though it'd been just a meek breath the witch had been alive. Gently, he'd turned Bonnie onto her back and bitten into his wrist. She would probably hate him even more when she woke up but he could worry about that later right then he'd needed to keep her stable.

Waiting a minute until his blood could unfold his magic he'd picked the witch up and carried her bridal style to his car. When he'd reached it the girl in his arms had started to stir and could help him to put her on the passenger seat of his Camaro. Slowly, she'd come back to consciousness and he'd gone behind the wheel.

When he'd arrived at the witch's home Bonnie still wasn't in any shape to walk on her own or do anything else for that matter. Refusing to let him in (the spell she'd casted kept sure of that) he'd left the car, thrown the girl over his shoulder and carried her back to his Camaro. Before she had any chance to leave it again the vampire had already been on his way to the Boarding House.

Arriving at his home he hadn't left the girl any room to argue and carried her right into the house and up to his room. He'd been way to exhausted to fight with her and Bonnie had still been fighting unconsciousness.

Why was it always them? He and the Bennett witch always ended up together (or both alone for that matter). But when both of them had rested for some time and Damon had checked her vitals and had her fed, they started to talk. First, it had been to make sure everything was alright with her, then it had been soothing for both of them.

They hadn't touched any deep, thorough subjects or innermost feelings, just easy nothings. Regardless, spending a whole night next to each other in Damon's bed relaxing and talking had changed something between witch and vampire.

That brought her back to her current issue. Since that night she couldn't get him out of her mind. He'd shown her another side of himself and though he still had been sarcastic and to some extend cocky, he hadn't been self-righteous, on the contrary, that night Damon Salvatore had been endearing.

He'd been the one who'd been there for her in her time of need. He'd been the one who'd taken care of her. He'd calmed her and reassured her. He'd distracted her and had made her laugh.

They'd bantered and bickered and teased each other. They'd been equals in that one night. He hadn't been a vampire and she hadn't been a witch. Just to people getting along.

Somehow, her exhaustion had messed more with her mind than she had originally thought.

Damon now occupied a great part of her conscious thoughts and he was there to stay.

It wasn't as if she liked him or anything. He was a vampire after all but she couldn't get rid of him. And after his help that night she owed him.

That's why it was so difficult for her to watch him like that. (At least, she tried to convince herself. She couldn't yet admit that she cared for him as more than just an ally.)

In his typical fashion he made his way straight to the bar of the Mystic Grill, ordered a scotch and sat on one of the bar stools.

Captured, she followed his every move.

Suddenly, his cell phone rang. The look on his face after reading the caller id told Bonnie everything. Elena.

It was sad seeing him like that. Hung upon a person who liked him but not enough. A person for whom he'd do anything and everything for but who would run back to his brother after he offered his life for her.

It was sad.

Bonnie didn't understand why he was doing this to himself. Himself and his brother.

Especially, after they'd been there before. After going through that pain before.

Why reliving the hurt and angst and tragedy over the same girl?

She didn't know why but the question always returned: Was this about Elena? Or was this about the look-a-like of Katherine? Were the Salvatores' feelings real or just a projection?

With Stefan, Bonnie started to believe it was about Elena. They fitted perfectly. They had a lot in common but differed enough from another not to get bored. And even though Bonnie couldn't imagine such a relationship for herself it was perfect for those two.

The witch, however, needed someone who challenged her, someone who could keep up with her and her comments, someone who had her back but didn't constrict her, someone who was able to fight with her, someone who was different but the same - the exact opposite way to Elena and Stefan's relationship. (Bonnie blamed her main element – fire – for that one.)

Damon, was a whole other story. Katherine had been his first love. He had loved her so much; he even died for her just to live with her. It was such a shame it had ended in such a tragedy. Shakespeare would have had a field day with their love story.

And even though Elena was the nice, kind and lovely girl Damon had thought Katherine to be, the main aspects which had drawn him to Katherine, which he'd been attracted to and which had called his attention in the first place, were missing in Elena.

Elena was popular and flirtatious, however, Katherine had been so much more. Katherine hadn't been a damsel in distress like the 19th century had tried to force its women to be. She hadn't been afraid of anything, she hadn't backed down easily. She'd had spunk, had been witty, strong and independent and with just one look she could ignite every male in her proximity with fire, with a burning desire for her. (Though the last part probably had been her compulsion.)

Bonnie's eyes followed his expressions. The look on his face became more hurt as the seconds went by.

It was always the same. Damon did whatever he could to save Elena, to protect Elena and even though he'd told her he'd let one of her friends die for her, he never let it come to that. He did all he could do so that not only Elena was able to see the next sunrise but her friends as well.

And though Bonnie hated to admit it, he was the one who saved Caroline. Sure, it hadn't worked out the way they'd planned but he hadn't known that his she-dog of an ex would come back with one of the worst timings ever. It was his blood that saved Caroline for them – she was still a part of their lives. Even when Bonnie needed time to get used to the idea.

It was easier to blame Damon for turning her friend than to admit that she herself almost killed one of her best friends.

Seeing Damon with such anguish on his face – his poker face wasn't as effective as he thought it was; not to her – it physically pained Bonnie.

_God damn it, Bonnie. Why did you have to go and make the same mistake as hundreds of women before you? You know what he is. You know what he did. And you damn well know what he's capable of doing!_

It didn't matter, though. She couldn't deny it anymore that she had a huge crush on Mystic Falls most eligible bachelor. _Damn it! There you are, superior to 80% of the womanhood, but what good does it for you when you need it? Nothing._

All Bonnie wanted to do was to go over to him. Share a few shots with him, maybe. Console him just by being close to him so he'd know he wasn't alone. She'd like to give him a hug or talk to him but she knew that wouldn't go over very well. She knew that when he was hurt, he thrashed out to see someone else hurting more than he was. In times like this he needed his space. Something neither Elena nor his own brother seemed to realize. Especially the last one was sad to say 'cause he'd known his brother close to 200 years now and he'd never got that about him. _What else didn't he see?_

However, Damon and her didn't have such a relationship. They'd just gotten to a stage where they greeted each other when they crossed paths. After their night of comfort, they even were on somewhat friendly terms.

Bonnie really hated her situation. And who was to blame for her dilemma? None other than Damon Salvatore. Did anyone but her see a pattern there?

Shaking his head, Damon sat at the bar. It had to be his fifth drink he knocked down. It was plainly obvious he was hurting but no one seemed to notice or care – no one but her. And all she could do was staying at her booth watching from afar.

If he just looked in her direction, if he just saw her …

Wishing never got things done, but she was forced to watch if he didn't want to be saved, to be heard. If he wanted to wallow in misery, there was nothing she could do to change that.

If he just …

Bonnie sighed. What had become of her? It had only been one night – one night of … friendship? Companionship? Why was she reacting like that?

But it was more than just that night. They were a team and as sad as it was most of the time the only person they could rely on was the other one. Not Elena for her, or Stefan for him. Not the persons who were closest to them, but the one they thought they couldn't stand. The one they thought they couldn't trust turned out the be the only one they could.

They didn't do anything that night, they didn't even have heart-to-hearts, most of their talks had been about the fight, her powers, vampire abilities, only shallow things. Damon hadn't tried to come onto her, he hadn't flirted, she hadn't felt like the damsel in distress forever thankful to her savior.

No, but that night had changed everything, nonetheless.

That night had opened Bonnie's eyes. As much as she refused to believe it, the witch had to admit that Damon and her were pretty much alike.

Not on the surface, no, she wasn't murderer (depending on who you asked – some vampires would beg to differ), she wasn't an alcoholic, she didn't let her mood swings out on other people, she wouldn't put her needs and wants before everything else no matter what, she didn't sleep around and she would never go after someone else's boyfriend.

But was it really so different, killing those tomb vampires? And Anna and Tyler's father? (Even though they were never meant to be affected.) And that was to a time when she first started being a witch. Who knew what was there to come. And she did turn her back on one of her best friends for something she had no fault in. And she caused storm and thunder when she was angry – so others were affected by her moods.

And Bonnie knew if there was a chance, she could reanimate her grams – she'd do it. And if someone threatened her friends and family, she'd do anything to prevent that. Was it really so different, to kill so many other people just to have one person live a bit longer? Even though Elena was her best friend?

That night brought some revelations.

There was more than that, though. Their infamous bantering – Caroline thought so, anyway – had to come from somewhere. Damon never fought that much with Elena (big surprise), Caroline or Stefan. One mean sentence had them shut up and Damon had his last word.

Bonnie didn't back down like the others in their group. The witch gave as good as she got. In turn, Damon fought back. They were similar there, that's why there fights and arguments could go on for hours when no one interrupted them.

And his sarcasm she hated that much?

Honestly, her humor wasn't that different. Even though she didn't use it as a weapon and kept most of her thoughts to herself, she had to admit that he often was spot on with his remarks – no matter how cutting they were.

Someone had to bring their group – especially Elena and Stefan – back to the real life. In a lot of situations Bonnie could only shake her head. It was good to have someone else on her side. (Even when he pretended it had been his idea. Jerk.)

With every passing second Bonnie had to watch the otherwise strong man crumble in front of her and sadly, she was the only one seeing it, seeing him. She had to do something but she had no idea what. If he realized someone was trying to help him, he'd lash out. Damon Salvatore didn't need any help – she knew that much.

As a waiter past her table, she gave him an order.

Few minutes later Bonnie watched as the bartender put a drink in front of Damon. The vampire's face one of surprise. She knew he was used to women hitting on him but mostly with a different kind of drink, she knew that, too. From afar, she observed every emotion on his face – only obvious by a few tiny changes in the tension of his facial muscles.

At first, Damon ignored the drink that was placed in front of him too lost in his own little world. But then, it seemed, the smell of the particular drink in front of him brought him back to the here and now. Recognizing the beverage, Damon frowned at the Bloody Mary.

Raising his head, Damon looked around the room for the culprit. Bonnie could see it. He was curious and annoyed at the same time – at least he wasn't thinking about Elena for now.

Animatedly, she followed his gaze all over the room, completely unnoticed by him. His eyes slid over her, undetected.

She waited for him to turn around to his drink once again before she rose from her table and made her way to the exit of the Grill.

"Enjoy your drink. That's as close as you'll get to a bloody girl. As close as I will let you get", the girl whispered with a smile in her voice on her way to the door.

Opening the door, Bonnie halted a moment and turned her head towards the bar to make herself known. When her glance fell upon the man at the bar he was already looking at her. He rose his glass in greeting and nodded in her direction.

The mix of his usual smirk and a real smile that graced his lips the last thing she noticed as she left the bar.


End file.
